Blog This: About ME

About ME. You'd think that I should know where to start, but I'm not really sure that I fully know who that is yet.

So to start simply, I'm Keshia. Known to my close family and friends as Keesh, known to my singing tutor as 'Quiche Lorraine', known by two little people as Mama.

I'm 24, but it seems so young actually writing that down. I've always felt like an older soul, even when I was a child so mostly I try and stay 'ageless'.

I'm the eldest of 'eight' children... and before you go whoaaa, no, I don't come from a family of parents that don't believe in contraception. My mum and dad broke up when I was a baby. Then they both went on to marry again, Mum having two children, Amy (19) & Daniel (17), Dad having the same, Mia (19, almost 20), Freya (almost 18). My step-dad left my mum and went on to have three more children, Kade (16), Holly (14) and Tayla (8). So, I'm the only one of 'me'. I don't think of any of my siblings as half or step siblings, to me, they are just my brothers and sisters. (did you get all of that, its a bit of a mouth full!!)

A strange fact about me, I'm one of those people that have never gotten over being scarred of the dark. I go all Ku-Foo Ninja like if I hear a bump in the night.

I've known my best friend for the same amount of years that I have been alive (minus a few hours). She has her butt planted over in Coventry in the United Kingdom at the moment and has been abroad with her mother since we were 14. I miss her terribly each and every day, so much that my body aches. The last time I seen her was July last year... and we ran a muck in our capital city. Ah sob, even good memories hurt sometimes.

I am a peoples person, I love finding out about people and what their stories are. Thats why in essence I started reading blogs. My blog, well its just a brain dump. I don't try to make it anything, just what ever comes out of my brain and through my fingers at that particular moment in time.

If I could defy one thing that has shaped me into the person that I am today, it would be the day I found out I was pregnant with my son. I was 19, and had been with my partner for two and a half months (we had been friends for much longer), initially, we thought that I would of been about 4-8 weeks pregnant and had both decided that we were going to terminate the pregnancy. We were both totally not ready to be parents. I had been sick for months on end leading up to the fateful day, and had actually had a pregnancy test done some months or so before hand 'just in-case'. It was a shock as well because I had been taking the contraceptive needle since I was 17.

My best friend took me up to the emergency ward one day, as I became really ill. The nurse there took one look at me and said I think your pregnant. I laughed.

I was.

Jase and I scheduled an ultra-sound for the following day. He picked me up from Uni, we went and sat in this gloomy waiting room. When my name was called I froze, once the ultra-sound was underway, I can remember starring at the screen thinking, why does this baby have fingers, it shouldn't have fingers. Then the words that the technician mouthed will for ever stay in my mind.

"From the measurements, it looks like your about 28 weeks, would you like to know what it is?"

I had one word circling my head, and it wasn't a nice one.

Turns out that that doctor had given me the wrong test results all those months earlier.

So from then I entered robot mode. I had 12 weeks to get ready for a baby. Heck, I didn't even have a stomach let alone trying to come to terms that there was a baby in there. That it was my baby was in there.

So it happened, I had a baby 14 weeks later. He became my baby and I his mother three days after that. (but that's a story for another time.) A baby that I now love with every ounce of my body and every inch of my soul.

So in essence, thats me. And a few things that have made and continue to make me, me.

Blog This: Goofing Around

Finally, a photo challenge that I am not lacking in inspiration for... I'm a goof, all of the time.

T'was the night of my 23rd birthday, when after having a delicious dinner out with my family, my sister (pictured above) decided that this little girl looked like me when I was younger...

Can you see the resemblance?

This lead on to a series of weird and wacky photos... at my sister's work of all places...

If you ever come across these photos Amy... just remember that I love you to!!

A fly on the wall...

A fly on the wall... ( a blog this post)

I’ve always, as long as I can remember been a reader. The type of reader that becomes so involved in what I read I sometimes feel as though I am living in a fantasy land. I have been known in the past to run into objects, be it walls, tv cabinets, doors... if you can name it I have more than likely crashed into it with my nose in a book.

Most of my all time favourite books come from my childhood, so if I could be a fly on the wall, it would be one that was in my childhood bedroom. I have always held onto the fantasy of my toys, mainly my soft animal/doll collection that they come to life once you shut your eyes for the night, and maybe if I was a fly then I could prove it was true once and for all.

Here are a few of the books that used to take me into this fantasy land that I have never left... (images taken from amazon.com)

and last but not least... my all time favourite

Challenge 51: Photographic challenge - CHANGE

I was hoping for a baby picture to share, but alas, still waiting. Have you ever really thought about the miricale of a baby developing inside their mothers womb. The amount of growth that happens in what is really only a very sort period of time is so amazing that I can't describe it in words...

23 Weeks

40.4 Weeks...

And the end result coming to a post real soon :)

Blog this: Pride

Tis about time that I tried to step back into the blogging world after an extended absence... and what easier way than with a Blog This challenge.

Tell us about a proud moment in life - of you, of someone else, when you made someone proud.  Maybe you want to focus on an aspect of your life or someone you know that exudes pride?

Well, no need for a second guess on what this one will be about... My beautiful son, Charlie. Most parents I know beam from head to toe with pride for their children. Your proud the moment they are born, your proud when they learn to walk, your even proud at times when they leave you with a 'nasty' surprise in their nappies, hehe. It is just such a simple thing that I am blessed with each day, to pick me out just look for that crazy mumma on the football side lines barracking like there's no tomorrow, or the mother that has more pictures hanging around the house than paint on the walls, because I am just so entirely 100% proud of my little man.

(It makes me giggle just thinking of me on the sidelines at auskick next year when he starts)

Blog This: How I learned to...

Tell your readers a tale. About something you learned. Be it driving, scuba-diving or maybe another language... riding a bike, learning to read, learning to cook a special meal - make it interesting or funny or shocking!

Before I start this post, I would like to warn people that this post involves a story about SIDS and some may choose not to read on and I have also chosen to change the names of those involved.

How I learned to cherish life...

In 2007, the most beautiful baby girl was born to a dear friend of mine. She was beyond perfect.

I can recall one night sitting with her mumma, and holding this precious bundle in my arms and thinking how it seemed as though she had graced us before, how she seemed so much older than her actual age. She had the cutest smile and the longest legs I have ever seen on a new born. Like I said, just perfect.

The Saturday morning that I received the phone call with the news of her death is a blur. I can't remember what was said, I just remember feeling an overwhelming feeling of needing to be with her mumma and her other son and needing to be there right then.

I've seen a lot of death in my life, family, friends, old, young, but the death of a 13 week old baby is something that leaves you with an emptiness that can't be described.

In her short life of 13 weeks, this precious baby girl had already done numerous things for the world in which she graced. She brought together people that hadn't been speaking for years, she showed a father what he was missing out from by not seeing his son, she showed a lot of people what life and love can be about, but you can't just sit by and expect it to happen by itself.

She taught me and a lot of other people to cherish life, to make everyday count and no matter what it may bring you, there will always be someone else going through something tougher. She was a special angel whilst she graced our earth, and now she is forever an angel gracing our skies. Life's lessons are hard, what's important is to take something away from them so that in time it brings you purpose.

Albert Einstein once said...

"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

So here is to a beautiful baby girl that will be forever in our hearts and minds, and thank-you for gracing us with your wonderful presence. Even if it was only for a short time. xx

Blog This: My Room with a View

My room with a view is the world in which we live.

My favourite view is optimism which I see everyday in the world we live in.

I see it in the eyes of my son when I wake up every morning.

I see it in the rays of the sunshine from my balcony.

I feel it when the sand is between my toes.

I feel it with the growing babe in my womb.

There are so many things to be thankful in the world, and I have learnt that it is much more rewarding to be optimistic than to wallow in the gloom. It's a favourite view worth having, because instead of having to reminisce on a particular scene, it is a view you can hold with you through your day... every day.