“It is cruel, you know, that music should be so beautiful. It has the beauty of loneliness of pain: of strength and freedom. The beauty of disappointment and never-satisfied love. The cruel beauty of nature and everlasting beauty of monotony. “
Benjamin Britten
Music. The ‘silent’ driver of our life’s. The glue for our memories.
There once was a day, which feels like a different lifetime ago, that I would have classed myself as a musician. It’s almost as if I have been reincarnated in my own lifetime without having to deal with the issue of dying. Music was my life.
Now, in my new reincarnated state, there is not enough space for music to be my life. Heck, I struggle to find the time to listen to anything, {let alone pick up an instrument} that doesn’t involve singing about dancing dinosaurs, superhero theme songs or cartoon jingles.
It’s depressing.
There once was a day, which also feels like a different lifetime ago, that the borders of my mirror where surrounded in various tickets from music festivals and concerts that I had attended. From Big Day Outs, to little intimate acoustic sets from indie artists. Now those tickets have been replaced with ones sprouting words like ‘Playschool live in concert, The Wiggles and *sigh* Dora the-god-damn-explorer.
It’s heart-breaking.
I think that I would even have to seriously sit and think for a while to tune into JJJ... Because I doubt I can even remember the station number.
So it’s time to reintroduce myself to the old me. The type of person that could reel endless lists of her favourite music off in the beat of a heart beat. The type of person that had a bad back from being constantly bent over her guitar. The type of person that was up with the latest news, bands and artists from the music industry.
I can’t wait to say hello to her.
I miss her.
3 comments:
I know the feeling. I was a SAHD for 2 years, barely touching the guitar. I think I wrote maybe 2 or 3 songs in that time. I realized that I need music in my life; that I have to make the time for creativity, if for no other reason than balance.
Good on you for bringing back the balance.
Yep! Ditto lovely, ditto!
Oh, I came to this post after trying to write a list for you... until I realised that my list of music was from a lifetime ago.
Time to buy some new cd's I think!
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